It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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