going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
How external is "for external use only"?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
