There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
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