you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize