This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Randomize