No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
