I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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