My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Randomize
