It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
