brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I still have a little drunk in my system
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
