Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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