she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I look better un-naked...
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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