after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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