Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize