Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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