Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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