Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
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