check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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