i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
