i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Randomize
