My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
