is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Last time i carry you out of a forest
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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