were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
