Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
