So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
