i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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