do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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