Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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