you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
