i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
