How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I just googled if crying burns calories
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
