Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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