I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
