Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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