I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
