theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize