good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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