The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
