Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize