so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
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