idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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