Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
