I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
you made out with another girl for some wings
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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