Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
