Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Randomize
