so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize