I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
