Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
