i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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