She's JV to your varsity
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
dude i'm inner monologue high
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
