You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Randomize
