My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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